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Coming from Scandinavia - we are just not used to these humongous portions. Just yet. But practise makes perfect. So when Bianca and I went to see “The Reader” we decided to blend in and be real American sweethearts.
First obstacle: How to get the butter to reach all the way down in the popcorn box? I have to admit the first time I saw these butter machines I almost fainted. But now that I have gotten used to the idea I must say I am quite intrigued. They are so much fun. One push equals about one hour on a treadmill. Just the thought of that makes me laugh out load - or LOL, as I have learned.
And then we have the drinks. Diet of course - to make up for the calories in the popcorn box, that is almost bigger than my apartment. The Diet Coke cup was so heavy that we almost had to ask a gentleman to carry them for us. But I was determined to drink it all in less than 2 hours.
Anyway - the film started. Bianca had the popcorn in her lap. We were grabbing a handful on turns. My hands were full of butter and grease, and I was thinking - damn, where are those napkins when you need them? Should I wipe my hands off on my jeans? Because we also bought some chocolate raisins that I wanted to try.
Next obstacle: Will the coke slip out of my hands because of the butter now?
Yey. After about half and hour I found a solution to the coke grabbing obstacle. I just had to bend down and grab the straw with my mouth without touching anything.
And while Kate Winslet was naked all over the place, having sex with a 16 year old in a dirty bath tub, Bianca and I were poring butter and popped corn down our throats.
After almost two hours, a lot of tears (mixed with butter of course) later, we decided to call it a quit. We just couldn’t do it. Our seats were filled up with popcorn, my jeans were sticky, my face was greasy, my blather was exploding, and I suddenly felt that my whole life was just meaningless and miserable (thanks Kate). The movie just killed my mood for eating my face off (yes Kate, it’s your fault). The message in the movie was just too serious to keep me staying focused on the popcorn.
Next time I will see another film that’s not so distracting to the super sized “adapting-into-the-real-American-culture” -project. So I am not giving up that easily. One thing I’ve learned truly so far is that you are not a real loser until you are “The Biggest Loser”.
Watch out girls - the one who laughs last, is the one who laughs the best!
By: Kjersti
Kjersti@inewyork.no
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See video
April 22nd, 2009 at 11:56 am
Lær deg å stave hvis du skal skrive på engelsk, er du snill.