Gulp fiction
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We’re all alone; Samuel L. Jackson and me. He penetrates me with his eyes and oozes coolness.
- May the force be with you, Samuel says.
He drills me with a look dripping of arrogance. I’m scared stiff. He smells cool and chill. I smell nervous sweat. He wears a purple synthetic jogging suit with a pink skeletal pattern. It’s ugly. But he makes it cool.
- May the force be with you, Samuel L. Jackson repeats, and concludes:
- Yep. That’s the coolest thing I’ve ever said in a movie.
I try to pronounce his nick name in Norwegian inside my head, to make him less authoritarian. “Kongen av kulhet.” It doesn’t sound half as cool as ”King of Cool.”
- No, you can’t just become cool, Jackson says.
- It’s something you are.
Jackson spreads out, like a purple starfish, over the divan in the hotel room. We are all alone. It’s a long way down. I’m getting flashbacks from Pulp Fiction. Jackson is “Jules”, quoting from Ezekiel 25:17. He pulls out his shooter. Pulls the trigger like a wildman. Blood is spurting. Jules Winnfield grins. No, I’m guessing there was a reason for Empire Magazine to hail Mr. Winnfield as the second coolest film character through all time. (Brad Pitt in Fight Club was no.1). I’m shaking my boots off. Samuel laughs, shaking his jogging suit.
The Pulp Fiction - star would probably not have survived secondary school in Norway. To my recollection, the worst thing you could be thought to be there, was conceited, or “thinking you were cool”. This is why I myself never thought I was cool. Even though I must admit I’ve tried very hard from time to time. But those who try too hard never become cool, according to Jackson. So maybe I just have to throw in the towel. Some never become cool, and some are just born cool.
- It’s about confidence and attitude, Jackson says.
20 minutes later I’m not afraid anymore. Samuel has actually nothing in common with Jules Winnfield, or anyone of his other cool parts. He’s just a nice, down-to-earth 59-year old guy, who doesn’t care that he walks around in a purple jogging suit in a fancy hotel. He doesn’t care if anyone likes his movies, either. As long as he’s allowed to hunt someone, kill someone and fight, he doesn’t care whether he’s a good guy or a bad guy. He hopes Barack Obama will win the election. He thinks Britney Spears is dopey. And afterwards he’s going home to his wife, who he’s been married to for 27 years. And that, that is cool.
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